Take Inventory of How You Love Like That Our desire is to provide you with the encouragement and tools you need to love others at the highest capacity. One of these tools is our free self-test. Answer a brief series of questions that will help you assess how you're doing in your journey toward becoming more mindful, approachable, grace-full, bold, and self-giving in loving those around you. Your results will be tallied automatically, so you can see which areas you're doing well in and where you have room for growth. Plus, you can come back and use it to measure your progress in the future. We hope this is a meaningful and useful tool for you as you grow in loving more like Jesus. We'll need your email to begin* By continuing you agree to our privacy policyGroup ID (optional) If you are taking the self assessment as part of a church or small group campaign enter your group id here. Chapter 1 - Mindful The first chapter of the book challenges us to love by being mindful. This online section will help you evaluate how well you love in this area. How Mindful Are You?From Chapter 1 If you’re curious to get a little snapshot of how inclined you currently are to practice mindfulness in order to love others well, take a moment to honestly indicate how frequently you experienced each of the following over the past week. Question 1: I’m aware of thoughts I’m having when my mood changes.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 2: I ask God for wisdom to recognize needs, thoughts, and feelings in others.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 3: I’m intentional about sincerely being my best self with others.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 4: Recognizing and acknowledging what others are thinking and feeling comes easy to me.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 5: I’m very aware when someone else is feeling embarrassed or emotionally wounded.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 6: I manage my emotions very well.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 7: I set aside my own immediate plans and goals – to help someone with their personal agenda.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 8: I listen for and I’m attuned to God’s promptings for me in relationship to others.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 9: I’m mindful of God’s presence with me – I hear his whispers.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 10: I’m good at relaxing my own busy agenda in order to tune into someone else’s.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Step 1 - Completed Thanks for completing the mindful section. Your score represents how attuned you are to others around you. The higher your score, the more conscientious you are of people’s needs, experiences, and feelings - the more you are able to set your own agenda aside (temporarily) to be loving. Conversely, the lower your score, the more detached you tend to be with others because you are consumed by your own agenda-driven pace. So the question is, how do you feel about your score? If you’d like to improve your ability to be more mindful, review the chapter and lift out two or three specific things you can do in some of your specific relationships. Write them down and consider what you will do and when you will most likely do it. In other words, what are some specific and personal agenda items you can temporarily set aside to be attuned to others in your life? And if you’re feeling brave, invite a trusted friend to read Love Like That with you so that you can work on this together. Remarkable things tend to happen when we have an accountability partner, someone who will process our experience with us and help us sometimes see what we aren’t seeing about ourselves. In fact, you might even consider staring a small group with several other people who will do this together. Chapter 2 - Approachable The second chapter of the book challenges us to love by being approachable. This online section will help you evaluate how well you love in this area. If you haven't read chapter two yet we recommend reading the chapter and then returning to take the inventory. How Approachable Are You?From Chapter 2Answer a few questions to get a bit of clarity on how inclined you currently are to open your arms and practice approachability as a means to love others. Honestly indicate how frequently you experienced each of the following over the past week. Question 1: People know me to be more inclusive than exclusive.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 2: I welcome people with differing ideas or political viewpoints even to the point of “turning the other cheek.”* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 3: I lean into humility far more than I lean into pride.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 4: I absolutely detest the idea of looking down on others or being snobbish.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 5: I want to include anyone who looks to be left out or feeling rejected.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 6: I’m known by my friends as someone who reaches out to undesirable people.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 7: I intentionally do not size people up by their clothes or their appearance.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 8: I intentionally work at being less self-centered and feeling superior to others.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 9: I’m the first to make sure someone in a social setting feels accepted and included.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 10: I work diligently to love my enemies – the people that make my life difficult.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Step 2 - Completed Thanks for completing the approachable section. Your score represents how accepting and inviting you tend to be with those around you. The higher your score, the more accessible and approachable you feel you are being. On the other hand, the lower your score, the more distant and even snobbish you are perceiving yourself to be. You may be struggling with unhealthy pride if your score is particularly low. Being honest about this tendency is essential to helping you overcome it. So how do you feel about your score? If you’d like to become more approachable, review the chapter and do your best to identify three specific things you can do to become more approachable (e.g., smile more at a particular person). The more specific you are, the better. Are you up for asking a trusted friend to read Love Like That with you so that you can process together ideas for becoming more approachable? You may find that the initiative to ask someone to do this with you is the key to opening your ability to be more approachable. So give this idea some serious consideration. It could be one of the most important things you do in your journey to becoming more loving. Chapter 3 - Grace-Full The third chapter of the book challenges us to love by being grace-full. This online section will help you evaluate how well you love in this area. If you haven't read chapter three yet we recommend reading the chapter and then returning to take the inventory. How Grace-Full Are You?From Chapter 3 Take a moment to honestly indicate how frequently you experienced each of the following over the past week and it will give you a little clarity on how inclined you currently are to open your heart to others. Question 1: I don’t focus on having other people earn my respect – I just give it to them.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 2: I stay completely clear of criticizing others and fault-finding.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 3: Like Jesus, I separate the sin from the sinner.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 4: I give love, respect and appreciation freely to people who don’t deserve it.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 5: People who know me well would describe me as a grace-giver.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 6: I know God loves me unconditionally.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 7: When I see someone acting in a way I don’t like, I’m inclined to give them the benefit of the doubt until I better understand the situation.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 8: I feel God’s love in my life and know I receive it even when I don’t deserve it.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 9: I’m more inclined to have an open heart than an accusing finger.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 10: I believe the best about people. Even if they’ve been bad, I want the best for them.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Step 3 - Completed Thanks for completing the grace-full section. You can see your responses below. Your score represents how much unconditional positive regard you tend to give those around you. The higher your score, the more grace-giving and accepting you feel you are being. On the other hand, the lower your score, the more judgmental or evaluative you are perceiving yourself to be. Either way, it comes down to attitude. So how do you feel about your score? If you’d like to become more grace-full, review the corresponding chapter and and see if you can identify three or more places in your life where you’d like to be less judgmental. The more specific you are, the better. And then consider concrete ways (from the chapter) that you can do just that. As always, you’ll make more marked improvement in this area if you confide in a trusted friend who is reading Love Like That along with you. Ask your friend to give you honest feedback, from their observations of you, on what you can do to be more grace-full in your relationships. Chapter 4 - Bold The fourth chapter of the book challenges us to love by being bold. This online section will help you evaluate how well you love in this area. If you haven't read chapter four yet we recommend reading the chapter and then returning to take the inventory. How Bold Are You?From Chapter 4 If you’re curious to get a little snapshot of how inclined you currently are to practice boldness in order to love others well, take a moment to honestly indicate how frequently you experienced each of the following over the past week. Question 1: My friends would say I’m transparent, straightforward, and direct.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 2: If I have a problem with someone, I meet with them as soon as I can to get it ironed out (rather than sulking or whining about it).* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 3: I speak out if someone is not being treated fairly – even if it means risking rejection.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 4: I’m bold when it comes to saying what needs to be said or doing what needs to be done.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 5: When my conviction is strong, I couldn’t care less what others think of me.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 6: I feel urgent about making things right when something is wrong in one of my relationships – I take immediate action to make it better.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 7: I feel congruent between my real self and the self I present to others.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 8: I sometimes make people feel uncomfortable because I’m a straight shooter who doesn’t put up with deceit or hypocrisy.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 9: I’d rather be genuine than win approval.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 10: I’m not afraid of rejection by others.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Step 4 - Completed Thanks for completing the bold section. You can see your responses below. Your score represents how courageous and bold you tend to be in saying what needs to be said. The higher your score, the more you tend to see yourself as a truth-teller who isn’t afraid to make waves to build a healthier and more authentic relationship. On the other hand, the lower your score, the more you tend to see yourself as being superficial and reluctant to talk about what matters most (because it’s risky or could potentially damage the relationship). If you’d like to become more authentic in your relationships and less timid about rocking the boat, review the chapter in Love Like That and identify a couple of concrete ways (with specific people) you can step out of your comfort zone to risk losing someone’s approval because you need to take off your interpersonal mask to be real. Are you willing to process this idea of becoming more bold in your relationships? Are you wiling to talk with a trusted friend about it? This is an area where an objective person can really add value to your personal journey. So consider the idea of inviting someone to help you see how you can become more bold in your relationships. Chapter 5 - Self-Giving The fifth chapter of the book challenges us to love by being self-giving. This online section will help you evaluate how well you love in this area. If you haven't read chapter five yet we recommend reading the chapter and then returning to take the inventory. How Self-Giving Are You?From Chapter 5If you’re curious to get a little snapshot of how inclined you currently are to being self-giving in order to love others well, take a moment to honestly indicate how frequently you experienced each of the following over the past week. Question 1: I’m intentional about putting myself in other people’s shoes to imagine how they think and feel.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 2: I work hard to treat other people the way I want to be treated.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 3: I’m known by my friends as someone who puts others' needs ahead of my own.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 4: I listen intently to others and intentionally put away my phone or other distractions to give them full focus.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 5: I work at emptying myself of a selfish desire to change other people.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 6: I love others as I love myself.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 7: I’m happy to play second fiddle.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 8: I go the extra mile for other people.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 9: I’m generous toward people in my life.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often Question 10: I’m willing to put myself second in order to put another person first.* Never Rarely Sometimes Often Very Often
